EMDR Therapist in California

For adults experiencing trauma, anxiety, and phobias

It’s time to quiet that inner critic.

You’re tired of getting in your own way—letting confidence or self-esteem hold you back in your relationships, your work, and your life.

You might find yourself constantly second-guessing your words or actions, hoping that they aren’t perceived the “wrong” way. Maybe you’re noticing the ways you feel taken advantage of or resentful in relationships because you struggle to speak up for what you truly want or need. You may be holding back from going after the raise or promotion you deserve due to self-doubt or uncertainty.

Low or impaired self-esteem can also look like:

• Feelings of shame or guilt

• Poor body image

• Difficulty setting boundaries

• Struggling with self-trust

• Feeling like an imposter or fraud

• Comparing yourself to friends or social media

You’re here because you know you’re hard on yourself. The grace and understanding you extend to others doesn’t translate to the way you view and care for yourself, and you’re ready for that to change.

In self-esteem therapy, we’ll get to the deeper root of the negative thoughts & beliefs that are holding you back.

Many factors play into our self-esteem: our upbringing, the pressures from society, trauma or painful experiences, and more. You might be noticing the way that negative or toxic relationships, family difficulties, or a stressful work environment are affecting your confidence. As we internalize the messages all of these things impart to us, it can warp the way we see ourselves—and, in turn, the way we show up in life.

Rather than just learning to cope with low self-esteem or confidence, counseling with me will help you explore and address those root causes. Together, we’ll challenge the false or inaccurate narratives to start rewriting the script in your life. We’ll look at things like:

• Early childhood experiences

• Interpersonal relationships (romantic, friendships, work, and more)

• Work stressors

• Societal messages

• …and more

How does self-esteem therapy work?

To really get a picture of why you feel the way you do today, we need to first understand what led here. I’ll take the time to listen to your story. We’ll look at things like your childhood and upbringing, current relationships, and significant experiences or transitions throughout your life.

From there, we’ll look at what’s going on today. Those automatic, almost subconscious negative thoughts about yourself—where are those coming from? Are they true? I’ll help you begin challenging those underlying beliefs that are impacting your self talk, no longer letting that inner critic be the prevailing voice in your life. You’ll learn to identify unhelpful or negative thoughts and replace them with ones that cultivate a healthy, more accurate sense of self.

Sometimes the source of negative self-worth is deeper and due to really painful experiences. As a trained trauma therapist, I can support you in this as well. Our work may also include assessing, processing, and navigating unresolved trauma, emotions, or experiences that have impacted your self-esteem and begin improving communication skills and boundary setting.

Together, we’ll help you build a more healthy sense of self: one that embraces your innate strengths, and accepts your flaws, so you can confidently go after what’s important to you.

And it can fit your busy schedule! All therapy is done online, from the comfort of your home or office. Learn more about online therapy in CA.

You are good enough.

Frequently Asked Questions about Self-Esteem Therapy

What is self-esteem? Why does it matter?

Self-esteem is the way we view ourselves. It has a powerful impact on every facet of our lives because the way we think, act, and respond to others is most often a reflection of our own feelings and beliefs about ourselves. If you don’t feel secure in who you are, it can impact not only the way you feel about yourself, but your relationships and the way you show up in life.

How do I know if I have low self-esteem? Isn’t it normal to be a little hard on yourself?

You may be someone who works hard and maintains high standards for yourself. There’s nothing wrong with that! However, when those high standards or internal pressure translate into a persistent self-criticism, that drive toward perfection can start to wear you down. You might find yourself hyperfocused on your shortcomings and feel unable to celebrate your strengths, blaming yourself when things go wrong, or avoiding new challenges for fear of failing. 

These kinds of things point to decreased self-esteem and are an indication that you could use some support in cultivating a healthier sense of self.

Will counseling change my self-esteem?

You are the only one that can ultimately change or improve your self-esteem, but therapy can absolutely equip you with the insight and skills to do that. You’ll learn to do things like:

• Challenge negative thoughts about yourself

• Improve communication and set healthy boundaries with the people in your life

• Navigate stress and anxiety more easily

• Feel more confident in your decisions and actions

• Accept yourself the way you are (flaws and all)

• Improve your relationship with your body

• Become more receptive to kindness

How can EMDR help with self-esteem?

One of the foundational parts of Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR) is addressing the underlying core beliefs that we hold about ourselves. By processing the past events that have laid the groundwork for the challenges you’re experiencing and addressing the current circumstances and triggers that hold you back, you can begin to fundamentally change your sense of self.

Whether the root of your self-esteem is from early in life or due to recent experiences, EMDR can help you:

• Heal injuries to your self-worth

• Build a healthier sense of self

• Cultivate more positive self-talk

Learn more about EMDR here.

How do we get started?

I offer a free 15-minute consultation to help you decide if I’m the right therapist to support you. Click this link to request your appointment. We’ll use this time to answer any questions you have about counseling, share a little bit about what you’re hoping to achieve, and determine if we’re a good fit to help you get there.